At the end of the day

When I was 10, I was carefree and I let my imagination flow, I didn't let anyone influence my thoughts. I didn't have any problems.
When I was 15, I cared so much about what others thought of me- how i dressed, how i looked, how i acted; I changed every aspect of myself to match society's norms, and to be "cool."
When I was 18, I hated my parents, I thought that they were horrible because they didn't give me freedom.
19 years of being alive and i've come to realize that despite the judgements, and things that people say, things that people tell you to believe, things that people say you can't achieve, things that people say to put you down
at the end of the day, those people don't matter, only you do.
at the end of the day, forgive and forget.
at the end of the day, loving yourself is the most important.
at the end of the day, you're still alive!

Throughout the 19 years of my life so far, I've learned so so so much. I am so fucking grateful to be living the life I am. I am soooo fucking blessed and am disappointed that I didn't realize that earlier. But it's okay because you live and you learn and that is just the cycle of life. The purpose of this message is to take note that every day is so so precious and honestly at the end of the day, you're still alive and if that's not the thing you consider most important then i pray for you, i really do.

For the future me, I hope you continue to look at the world with the eyes of a child so you can see the beauty and positivity in everything.

Just a note to self.

Hello, today is the first day of spring break! And I am currently jamming to some music and cleaning the house :) And just enjoying my own company. I feel like I havent been able to just sit and breathe for a while. Like I have so much free time everyday but i never just sit down and listen to music without going on social media and whatnot. I thought about having a boyfriend again bc I saw carolyn's blog post (dont feel bad carl its just what happens when ur bestfriend has a bf and u dont LOL), so ya i was like wow mbn to have aboy to go on adventures with all the time but i got over it in, im not even kidding, like a minute. And now im like fuck boys because I dont need anyone to make me happy and you know what im happy doing me and being single. Im actually so content with life rn and im gonna spend this whole spring break doing me. Im planning to have a lunch date with myself sometime this week like at a nice outdoor restaurant :) Also today (after work) Im getting banzai with tien and also after we r prob gonna go to ikea bc tiffany is now an adult and she needs to buy something for her room xD okie this was a long para so CYA

Love yourself

Here's a reminder for you when you get a bf:
Never be so blinded by love that you choose your boyfriend over any of your friends. Be rational. Absolutely do not be blind and naive. Believe what is actually true and don't let love sway you.

Hi. I am scrolling through my blog and just editing here and there and i realized that I used to have so much negativity in me omg. I complained about everything. And it's not like I don't anymore, but I complain way less and appreciate waay more. No wonder I was so unhappy at times in my first few years in high school. I was just miss negativity. I literally analyzed everything and plucked out all the flaws in them and in me. How unhealthy !!!! I'm so glad that I got past that age and I've matured because negativity sucks and I would hate for it to be a part of my life. I think a part of being healthy isnt just about my body but it's about my mentality too and lately I have been happy which is great. Yay Tiffany!!

Wishing I had dormed so i could make more friends and have a full college experience and be an adult and decide when I want to go out and party and decide how late I want to stay out. But im no where near being an adult HAHA bc I don't have a job and i'm not as responsible as I should be. I have years to party and have fun honestly. And I have years to make friends. But sometimes I just wished I had more of a choice on how I wanted to start off my college experience.

hi hello, i really wish i had a bf. I feel like im so unexperienced and innocent and ugh. I feel like i never had one just because I am so picky with boys :-( But I also feel like i havent met someone that clicked with me. And sometimes it makes me insecure. I usually brush it over. Note to self: Being independent is as great as having a boyfriend. Being independent means you get to party a lot and flirt and have fun without boundaries. k bye

Remember that you are a strong person. But that sometimes its okay to be weak. 

I hope later on I dont fall for someone that is a complete ass. I hope i dont fail to realize when someones an ass or to be fooled by them. I hope I meet someone with depth, someone with passions and goals. Someone who is sincere. I hope that if that someone turns out to be a dick that i dont stay with him just because I feel the need to have someone to fill my empty void. I hope i dont fall too fast. I hope I dont let myself become weak and fragile. I hope i stay strong with the mentality that independence is just as great as relationships. I hope i stay independent even when im in a relationship. I hope i dont depend on him too much. I hope i learn to love myself more than I will love him. I hope that if he leaves me for someone else, i wont be some sore loser that blames myself for letting some sorry dickhead leave me. I hope to one day marry someone great and find a beautiful house near a park. I hope I dont lose any friends. I hope my sister grows up to be a beautiful and smart woman and to stop being influenced by the horrible society that we have succumb to. I hope that my children will be able to express themselves without fearing others' judgements. I hope that I meet someone with an open mind. I hope that if my children become gay they wont feel afraid to show it and to have pride. I hope my parents grow old to see who I become and are proud of me. I hope I become successful. I hope I meet all the people back in grade school and make them sorry for ever doubting me. I hope I become hot and make anyone who has ever hurt me because of my appearance sorry that their ass didnt go for me. I hope I adapt to a healthier lifestyle. I hope i become a cool mom. I hope I live a life full of brightness. I hope I live a life that I would love to wake up to. I hope my smiles never fade. I hope that i do a lot of charity and to be able to help those in need. I hope I stop being lazy. I hope i explore the world more. 

on a journey to loving myself
i figured moping around and complaining won't make any changes and that If i want results, I'm gonna have to do something about it.

Gender equality

It's so wrong that so many women are denied equal rights because of their gender. Women are always expected to be small, to be sensitive, to be weak, while men are always expected to be strong, to be aggressive. How come society always has to define groups of people? It isn't fair that each person should be grouped into certain groups, because we're all human. Why can't someone just be classified as human but always have to be classified as womanly, manly, weird, bisexual, homosexual?
Is it fair that females still get married off at the age of 13? Is it fair that as a human, females' lives are chosen for them? How come each and every one of us can't have equal opportunities at leading out own life in the way we want without being afraid of judgement from others? How scary is society that people kill themselves due to gossip? Why should society have the ability to make someone look at themselves so lowly? When will this issue ever go away, if no one is willing to even discuss it? Women, who are always expected to have "ambition but not too much ambition" because they are to give birth to children and to live under their husbands. Men, who are always expected to be strong and masculine because otherwise they are seen as unmanly. Feminism is and always will be a problem for both men and women. It will always limit every being from being their true selves. Because people are too afraid to speak of something that will cause divisions within our nation. When will sexism ever end?

"If not me, who? If not now, when?" - Emma Watson 

Its really annoying how I don't have the courage to step out of my comfort zone and as a result I miss out on so many life changing experiences.
Wish I had the courage to join ASB
Wish I had the ability to lead students in confirmation
Wish I had the courage to speak out
Wish I was more outgoing
Wish I was more diversified and put myself out there
Wish I didn't have social anxiety

Many things I wish I could be tbh. But in the end, my choices leave me regretting all the things I could've been and could've done.

About time

I'm shutting up. No more complaining. No more excuses.
Im gonna eat healthy. Maintain a healthy body. Do my homework on time. Study hard. I'm gonna succeed. I'm gonna be confident. ✌ xoxo tiff 💋 haha